Making Change Easier

Photo by Chris Lawton on Unsplash

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"​It is not the strongest or the most intelligent who will survive but those who can best manage change."
​- Charles Darwin​

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(3.5 Minute Read or Listen Below)

​We love to hate change. Most of us make new year resolutions, only to abandon them by the middle of February, if not sooner.

The Statistics

Of American adults who declare resolutions for January 1, only 8% of them achieve their goals by year-end. Whether the goals are small and easily achievable, or significant and life-changing, the achievement rate remains unchanged. Why don't we keep the commitments we make to ourselves? My theory is, change is about habits, and habits can be hard to change.

Research shows half of our everyday behaviors are repeated in the same location every day. Sometimes, this is good. After all, habits conserve the brain's energy. But how do we increase our chances of successfully changing counterproductive behaviors or creating new beneficial behaviors?​

The Reality

When we believe it's time to make a change, we generally burden ourselves with a laundry list of perceived shortcomings that will instantly resolve when the calendar flips to January 1. We declare we will lose weight, eat healthy, exercise more, quit smoking, get organized, achieve inbox zero, and spend less time on our cell phone. And our delusion is we will accomplish all of these improvements at the same time! In most instances, the habits formed around these behaviors are deeply ingrained and not likely to be conquered by willpower alone. Yet this is still what we expect of ourselves.

Phillippa Lally, a health psychology researcher at University College London, found it takes more than two months, on average, before a new behavior becomes automatic. Sixty-six days to be exact, not the 21 days we have so long been lead to believe. In Lally's 2009 research article, it took anywhere from 18 days to 254 days for people to form a new habit. The time required to develop new habits varied on a multitude of factors, including the behavior to be changed, the person, and the circumstances. 

Typically, when we have not achieved perfection on all our resolutions by day 21, we throw in the towel and call it quits. After all, this "change" thing is hard. But change rarely happens in a straight line. Our negative behaviors often return or lurk in the background. While we perceive the lingering of these undesirable behaviors as a sign of failure, nothing could be further than the truth. It presents an opportunity to learn more about ourselves and develop the skills to persevere through uncomfortable feelings and to trust ourselves. But we rarely set ourselves up for success when it comes to change.

Our brains have limited resources, and our willpower is like a muscle. When it gets tired, we more easily revert to old patterns. The more frequently we perform the new behavior, the weaker the old habit becomes. Therefore, it helps to begin with small changes, one at a time, that don't require much willpower.

The Plan

So how do we give ourselves a fighting chance at success? We must be reasonable and have a solid plan. The framework of The 5 Step Productive Environment Process™ is a great tool to help you formulate that plan. The steps below sound simple, but don't underestimate their impact.

1. State your vision. What is it you really want to accomplish? Have you thought beyond the surface aspects of your goal? What will you feel, see, and hear when you achieve your goal? If it seems overwhelming to define what you want, perhaps begin by identifying what you don't want.
2. Identify your obstacles. What could prevent you from accomplishing your vision? This step will only work if you are brutally honest with yourself. (I know, I hate that too.) Is something really an obstacle, or is it just the convenient story you tell yourself to avoid the discomfort of change? Whether you have control over them or not, include all obstacles on your list, and we'll get to overcoming them later.
3. Commit your resources. Where can you get the support you need to achieve your vision? Think of the who, what, when, where, and how available to you.
4. Design and execute your plan. To accomplish your vision, design a plan to overcome your obstacles and utilize your resources. When you determine in advance how you will respond to obstacles, they are less likely to derail you. Giving intentional thought to your resources will ensure they are put to their best use, with contingency plans.
5. Sustain your success. As mentioned earlier, change rarely happens in a straight line. All plans need periodic course correction. We learn and grow as time progresses. Circumstances and our goals change. Rather than feeling discouraged when things don't go as planned, re-examine your situation and adjust accordingly — repeat steps 1 - 4 of this process as many times as needed.

Within you, you have everything you need to be successful. With enough repetition of your desired behavior, connections will be made and strengthened in your brain. Over time, your new practice will require less effort and will become your default pattern. Keep assessing your progress and adjusting where needed.

Be patient with yourself, and remember, you are your greatest asset!

"Change will not come if we wait for some other person, or if we wait for some other time. We are the ones we've been waiting for. We are the change that we seek." ~Barack Obama